Swine Flu Emerging in China

"Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo" (rustyvandura) 07/02/2020 at 17:18 • Filed to: None

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Hurry up and say something stupid, Mr. President.

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CB > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 17:28

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Wow, swine flu! I wasn’t expecting that to be July’s disaster.

MonkeePuzzle > CB 07/02/2020 at 17:31

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I think I just won the disaster pool!

MonkeePuzzle > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 17:35

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gina has the best pork, but not as good as american pork and bacon is good, good bacon is uge right now, the ugest. so this is kung flu, the last one wasnt a china virus so I’m not a racist, but we are making coal come back, and its just great, the greatest, american farmers, the way they flandangle the land, and the pork we grow, this is why importing things is the best to export only american made grown pork is pig to the worlds food that monsanto is the best, I know jim monstanto and his food is just the best, and think of the bacon cheeseburgers with this swine flu. and swine means pig, no one knows that, but I know that, swine is pig is latin and spanish. the french say pig but we know its swine. and our doctors, the best doctors, we already have plans in place, its double down time we just treat this and then its winning always winning, the winningest. I rememeber the time obama gave us swine flu, it was during obama that the swine flu was developed and we’re going to get to the bottom of it, we have top me looking into the emails about obama swine flu. top. men. 

RallyWrench > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 17:39

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Did we skip the murder hornets? I feel like we skipped the murder hornets. 

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > CB 07/02/2020 at 17:45

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Eh, it’s only “emerging”. I think it’s on the radar for October’s disaster.

I guess that the possible assassination attempt on JT could have been July’s disaster

https://globalnews.ca/news/7130870/rideau-hall-rcmp-ottawa/

ttyymmnn > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 17:48

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I can only manage one global pandemic at a time, please.

CB > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 07/02/2020 at 17:49

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Holy fuck.

The world is going sideways faster than I thought.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > CB 07/02/2020 at 17:50

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NVM, article says that he guy “only wanted to talk” to JT.  I always ram a pickup truck through the fence of those I want to talk to.  And I always bring 3 loaded guns

MonkeePuzzle > ttyymmnn 07/02/2020 at 17:51

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then I’d say you’re doing great! the government cant even handle one. 

CB > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 07/02/2020 at 17:53

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In the work group chat, I threw out that joke of “wanted to talk” being the assassin’s version of “these aren’t my pants” to explain why he was there.

CB > RallyWrench 07/02/2020 at 17:55

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They saw we had a lot on our plate and are waiting for us to be ready.

Murder hornets, despite their name, are actually very considerate, and also cognizant of larger societal problems.

Dead_Elvis, Inc. > MonkeePuzzle 07/02/2020 at 17:58

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Is this what having a stroke feels like? I’m not sure I read all of it before everything got really blurry & I had to close my eyes.

MonkeePuzzle > Dead_Elvis, Inc. 07/02/2020 at 18:03

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would you say that you are in a condition to walk down a small ramp after such a speech?

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:05

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I'm honestly wondering which Mr President you might be referring to cause there's more than one that's made some thoroughly daft pronouncements this year...the efforts from blokes in Brazil, The Philippines, Russia, Turkmenistan, Indonesia and China have all put forward good competitive stupid statements so far. USA doesn't have it all their own way and might need to up their game to maintain their winning margin

HammerheadFistpunch > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:05

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I’ve had swine flu, it sucks but at least its gastro not pulmonary  

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > CB 07/02/2020 at 18:06

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Just as long as it's not November...that month is already taken.

WilliamsSW > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:06

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 How unoriginal. 

CB > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/02/2020 at 18:07

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For the American Election?

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > MonkeePuzzle 07/02/2020 at 18:13

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RallyWrench > CB 07/02/2020 at 18:14

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More than can be said of a lot of the American populace right now, a tip of the hat to the hornets .

Dead_Elvis, Inc. > HammerheadFistpunch 07/02/2020 at 18:15

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oh shit

more TP hoarding!

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > CB 07/02/2020 at 18:16

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Sure... provided of course that there is a definitive result...

Nauraushaun > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:18

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Oh god we have 1 pandemic in a hundred years and now everything is a pandemic.

Thanks news sites

fintail > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:25

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This is a hoax!  By you know who.

ranwhenparked > Dead_Elvis, Inc. 07/02/2020 at 18:35

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No, we hoarded toilet paper for a lower respiratory infection. For swine flu, we’re going to have to stockpile over the counter cold and flu medicine. 

WilliamsSW > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/02/2020 at 18:37

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In the pool,  I have "definitive result that the loser won't accept"  it's the favorite along with a cancellation for dubious reasons 

ranwhenparked > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:41

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Dead_Elvis, Inc. > ranwhenparked 07/02/2020 at 18:42

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I swear I ’m not trying to make meth, I just need a pallet of pseudoephedrine to fight the Hershey squirts

ranwhenparked > Dead_Elvis, Inc. 07/02/2020 at 18:44

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Pro tip - the pharmacy will, at some point, arbitrarily stop selling to you and hang your picture up by the register, but you can always find some college kids to go in and buy more for you in exchange for beer money. 

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > WilliamsSW 07/02/2020 at 18:47

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And that’s an option too. Though I’d personally prefer it if you lot just got it over with, one way or the other.

thatsmr > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 18:49

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2020 is the gift that keeps on giving!

WilliamsSW > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/02/2020 at 18:52

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Nah-It’s 2020. We’re going to tease you into thinking it will all work out for the best, then pull the rug out and go straight to the worst case scenario.

ranwhenparked > Nauraushaun 07/02/2020 at 18:52

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Don’t worry, the official position of the Chinese Communist Party is that a catastrophic global pandemic cannot originate in the People’s Republic of China, so we’ll be fine. 

DAWRX - The Herb Strikes Back > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever 07/02/2020 at 19:04

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Wait this isn’ t how people outside of Texas start conversations?

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > WilliamsSW 07/02/2020 at 19:07

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Oh dear...

WilliamsSW > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/02/2020 at 19:15

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Deal Killer - Powered by Focus > RallyWrench 07/02/2020 at 19:17

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Murder hornets were last month. This month is the sodomy geese.  Next month, locusts.  

DipodomysDeserti > Nauraushaun 07/02/2020 at 19:17

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We’ve had more than one pandemic in the last hundred years. The last one was in 2009 and was caused by H1N1 (swine flu).

https://www.cdc.gov/flu/pandemic-resources/basics/past-pandemics.html

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > WilliamsSW 07/02/2020 at 19:19

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We already have the theme song too

DipodomysDeserti > HammerheadFistpunch 07/02/2020 at 19:20

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It depends. About half the people killed by H1N1 died from viral pneumonia. A friend of mine had it and her symptoms were all respiratory.

Dead_Elvis, Inc. > ranwhenparked 07/02/2020 at 19:20

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Guess I’m kinda screwed then, since all the students seem to be on vacation or something. No idea why.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > DAWRX - The Herb Strikes Back 07/02/2020 at 19:21

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I like the idea of this being known as a “Texan door knock”

ranwhenparked > Dead_Elvis, Inc. 07/02/2020 at 19:23

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The ones in off-campus apartments seem to still be hanging around for the summer. 

Nauraushaun > DipodomysDeserti 07/02/2020 at 19:35

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Ah, right you are. Even so I accuse them of cashing on recent pandemic hysteria

HammerheadFistpunch > DipodomysDeserti 07/02/2020 at 19:36

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interesting.  I didn’t know that.

punkgoose17 > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 19:55

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It is all fine! [nope nope nope]

RallyWrench > Deal Killer - Powered by Focus 07/02/2020 at 20:07

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Goddamn sodomy geese, not again! 

punkgoose17 > RallyWrench 07/02/2020 at 20:17

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I read the murder hornets are a normal hornet in North America, the news just made up a name for them.

punkgoose17 > Deal Killer - Powered by Focus 07/02/2020 at 20:19

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Sodomy geese is just when someone has their head up their ass, and the Canadian geese still try and go for the eyes.

PatBateman > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 21:02

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GOD DAMMIT CHINA FUCKING SOTP. 

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > MonkeePuzzle 07/02/2020 at 21:04

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Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > Dead_Elvis, Inc. 07/02/2020 at 21:06

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And ammunition.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/02/2020 at 21:15

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I would be referring to the president of the United States of America.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > fintail 07/02/2020 at 21:16

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I don’t know by whom; The Onion?

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > ranwhenparked 07/02/2020 at 21:53

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But he’ll still hit it...

ranwhenparked > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 22:02

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She’s got what he wants

fintail > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/02/2020 at 22:10

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By the Dems of course, just like ‘Rona

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/03/2020 at 00:15

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Your idiot neither walks alone nor works in isolation. You may take some comfort from that? 

DipodomysDeserti > punkgoose17 07/03/2020 at 00:44

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The Asian giant hornet (murder hornet) was first spotted in North America this year, and would fuck up honeybee populations if it ever establishes itself.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nytimes.com/2020/05/02/us/asian-giant-hornet-washington.amp.html

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/03/2020 at 02:34

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My  idiot? I didn’t vote for the guy. But I’m stuck with him.

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/03/2020 at 04:26

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I didn't vote for mine either. But he's still mine. Same rules apply to you.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media 07/03/2020 at 11:14

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Where are you? Do I remember Australia?

SilentButNotReallyDeadly...killed by G/O Media > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 07/03/2020 at 19:14

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You do.